Too often I hear stories of adult children abusing their elderly parents and we all cry foul. But have we ever stopped to consider the reason why.
Some doctors say that abuse is a learned behavior, if that true, then parents who abuse their children will have abusive in their old age.
Most abusive parent never stops to realize that the seed they are sowing they will reap.
Imagine the following; you have three children, one could do no wrong,( even though he is the devil incarnate) second one is selfish and self-centered, the third just wants to be loved, but is treated like a doormat.
The parent visible mistreats and abuse one child, that child is forced to leave home at a young age and in some cases live in the abuse for a long time. Never get any encouragement or help but somehow they manage to build a life for themselves.
In the meantime mommy and daddy make no provision for their future while living life to the fullest, or illness and misfortune came to knock at their door.
Now mommy and daddy are in need of help. Favorite children are no where to be found (like their parent they are living life and have no place or time for anyone except themselves).
Abused, unloved, mistreated child is called in to help her parents that never take the time to say or do one kind thing to her.
Unable to say no, this child takes on the role of caregiver to her abusive parents, and the only way (at times) to maintain sanity is to repay in kind the treatment that was learned from her parents.
Let us all try to plant good seed so that when it comes time for reaping, we can reap good fruit.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Monday, January 31, 2011
Snow..............!!
Snow………!!
Four days after twenty inches of snow fell on top of twenty two inches that seems as if only days ago ( December 25th) some neighborhoods are still covered with the white stuff. Four lane streets are down to two lanes and two lanes are down to one. Cars are still buried and sidewalks are still covered.
On my way home on Saturday I past a home with the car in the driveway and as I looked around there were about three feet of the white stuff all along the front of the house. All I could think was, they have their work cut out for them. One may think that three feet is not much, but when you have snow pack street with no place for more and you have to clear enough to get a car through, it’s not only a lot but hard work.
That is why sometimes I choose to walk in the street because the sidewalks are not always clear all the way.
I could be walking and thinking that the sidewalk is clear all the way and then you realize that you now have to climb a two or three feet high snowbank because whoever clear that area did not cut a path through the snow and now I am at a snow dead end. I also came upon a sidewalk that is blocked with a car, it’s owner just clear his driveway and park his car so that you climb into the snowbank or turn back to a clear path to the street to go around the car. When you look at the condition in the streets, one would think that we would be more considerate of each other.
When I clean, I always clean to meet my neighbor so that we don’t have a snow dead end. It does not take much, just a few more shovel full and you’re done, trust me, I’ve done it.
The major had said that this is a record breaker for January in NYC for the amount of snow that fall.
There is still snow on the ground, and it’s still icy so …..Be Careful.
Four days after twenty inches of snow fell on top of twenty two inches that seems as if only days ago ( December 25th) some neighborhoods are still covered with the white stuff. Four lane streets are down to two lanes and two lanes are down to one. Cars are still buried and sidewalks are still covered.
On my way home on Saturday I past a home with the car in the driveway and as I looked around there were about three feet of the white stuff all along the front of the house. All I could think was, they have their work cut out for them. One may think that three feet is not much, but when you have snow pack street with no place for more and you have to clear enough to get a car through, it’s not only a lot but hard work.
That is why sometimes I choose to walk in the street because the sidewalks are not always clear all the way.
I could be walking and thinking that the sidewalk is clear all the way and then you realize that you now have to climb a two or three feet high snowbank because whoever clear that area did not cut a path through the snow and now I am at a snow dead end. I also came upon a sidewalk that is blocked with a car, it’s owner just clear his driveway and park his car so that you climb into the snowbank or turn back to a clear path to the street to go around the car. When you look at the condition in the streets, one would think that we would be more considerate of each other.
When I clean, I always clean to meet my neighbor so that we don’t have a snow dead end. It does not take much, just a few more shovel full and you’re done, trust me, I’ve done it.
The major had said that this is a record breaker for January in NYC for the amount of snow that fall.
There is still snow on the ground, and it’s still icy so …..Be Careful.
Monday, January 10, 2011
It's Me..........
How many times have you answer the phone are listen to v-mail and Hello mother/father etc and hear a too familiar voice say, 'it's me" without leaving their name. Or you calling someone and say 'it's me" without giving your name. I think we are all guilty of this at one time or the other.
This weekend I got just such a voice mail from one of my daughters, "Hi mother, it's me" then proceed to leave her message without leaving her name assuming that I know her voice.
If we assume that the person we are calling recognizes our voice and will know who we are, why then do we say "it's me" and not leave our name.
I sometimes say, it's your mother or to my mother I say " it's your first born child". There is no doubt as to who I am, she can only have one first born or my child can have only one mother.
If we need to affirm who we are why not say, hello, it's Mary or Bob.
Almost everyone in my life have their own distinct voices (except for my son and grandson), I will never mistook their voice for someone else. So just to let you all know I got you at "Hello"
This weekend I got just such a voice mail from one of my daughters, "Hi mother, it's me" then proceed to leave her message without leaving her name assuming that I know her voice.
If we assume that the person we are calling recognizes our voice and will know who we are, why then do we say "it's me" and not leave our name.
I sometimes say, it's your mother or to my mother I say " it's your first born child". There is no doubt as to who I am, she can only have one first born or my child can have only one mother.
If we need to affirm who we are why not say, hello, it's Mary or Bob.
Almost everyone in my life have their own distinct voices (except for my son and grandson), I will never mistook their voice for someone else. So just to let you all know I got you at "Hello"
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Travel and Security......
We all want to feel safe when we travel, right? So why is the news that there will be tougher screening at the airport including patting down is met with such reluctance.
The TSA is not out to get everyone who is traveling, just the ones that should no be.
Since 911 I have traveled some and it never takes me more the three to five minutes to go through the gate once I get there. I know what not to bring with me on the plane and so those items get in my check luggage or left at home. I also wear light clothing and am ready to take my shoes off. When I travel in the winter I have my socks on.
All beeping items I put in the bowl then go through the scanner with ID in hand. If a bra hock or a pant/skirt hock goes off, no worries a wave of their wand or a pat here or there and I am done. I pick up my stuff and I am on my way.
When we create excitement at the gate, we also create an opportunity where the wrong person can slip by when too much attention is on us.
We must remember that most of the security personnel are as uncomfortable as we are but when we cooperate with them they are able to do their job more efficiently.
If we do our part by following the rules, be patient and give ourselves enough time everyone will get through the process that much faster.
We should all try to do our part, no matter how small to make our country a safer place for all.
As the holiday season begin, travel safe, and travel smart.
The TSA is not out to get everyone who is traveling, just the ones that should no be.
Since 911 I have traveled some and it never takes me more the three to five minutes to go through the gate once I get there. I know what not to bring with me on the plane and so those items get in my check luggage or left at home. I also wear light clothing and am ready to take my shoes off. When I travel in the winter I have my socks on.
All beeping items I put in the bowl then go through the scanner with ID in hand. If a bra hock or a pant/skirt hock goes off, no worries a wave of their wand or a pat here or there and I am done. I pick up my stuff and I am on my way.
When we create excitement at the gate, we also create an opportunity where the wrong person can slip by when too much attention is on us.
We must remember that most of the security personnel are as uncomfortable as we are but when we cooperate with them they are able to do their job more efficiently.
If we do our part by following the rules, be patient and give ourselves enough time everyone will get through the process that much faster.
We should all try to do our part, no matter how small to make our country a safer place for all.
As the holiday season begin, travel safe, and travel smart.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Politics
Mid Term…….Losses/Gains
We are a people of instant gratification.
After a bankrupted housing market, a banking industry in a state of free fall, thousands out of work, a war no one wants and an economy in the state of shock, the American people expected that president Obama would go into the White House and overnight fix all the problems that took years to break.
He is one man fighting a battle that very few want him to win.
How many past presidents promised to fix healthcare and has failed? Not saying it is now perfect, but it is at a place where it can be worked on, fine tuned, if you will.
They all said he put too much into the stimulus package that did not really help much, at lease he is trying to do something.
The quote, “if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem” comes into play. Everybody criticize him but no one have an idea or suggestion of how to make things better.
As far as I see it, our government is not working as a team to bring us out of the pit we are in, all they are doing is making promises, pointing finger, and playing the blame game.
Everyone wants the country out of this economic slump overnight, but no one is willing to work to that end.
Two years ago we were willing to give Mr. Obama a chance, but because he as not pulled out his magic wand and clean thing up we are ready to call for change…It will take any newly elected president more than two years to clean up the mess that started in Washington years ago, from over spending to corruption.
What we need in Washington is a new set of Politician whose agenda is the welfare of our country and not their personal gain.
Loss or gain?......If we can’t wait for the medication to do its job, then it’s our loss and not Mr. Obama’s.
We are a people of instant gratification.
After a bankrupted housing market, a banking industry in a state of free fall, thousands out of work, a war no one wants and an economy in the state of shock, the American people expected that president Obama would go into the White House and overnight fix all the problems that took years to break.
He is one man fighting a battle that very few want him to win.
How many past presidents promised to fix healthcare and has failed? Not saying it is now perfect, but it is at a place where it can be worked on, fine tuned, if you will.
They all said he put too much into the stimulus package that did not really help much, at lease he is trying to do something.
The quote, “if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem” comes into play. Everybody criticize him but no one have an idea or suggestion of how to make things better.
As far as I see it, our government is not working as a team to bring us out of the pit we are in, all they are doing is making promises, pointing finger, and playing the blame game.
Everyone wants the country out of this economic slump overnight, but no one is willing to work to that end.
Two years ago we were willing to give Mr. Obama a chance, but because he as not pulled out his magic wand and clean thing up we are ready to call for change…It will take any newly elected president more than two years to clean up the mess that started in Washington years ago, from over spending to corruption.
What we need in Washington is a new set of Politician whose agenda is the welfare of our country and not their personal gain.
Loss or gain?......If we can’t wait for the medication to do its job, then it’s our loss and not Mr. Obama’s.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Local or Limited "stop"...........Bus
On my way to and from work, there are two bus services that I can take;
The local, which stops at about 15 to 16 times or the limited that stops 7 times which is an eight to fifteen minutes different in travel time.
Sometimes when I get my bus stop a local will come by followed by a limited.
Other times the local will come and I will choose to wait for the limited even though I do not see it coming, sometimes it works but sometimes, like this morning it takes five to ten minutes to come.
By the time it comes (and sometimes it doesn’t stop because it is crowded) if I had taken the local that came first I would have gotten to the train that much sooner.
So, local or limited bus……….?
The local, which stops at about 15 to 16 times or the limited that stops 7 times which is an eight to fifteen minutes different in travel time.
Sometimes when I get my bus stop a local will come by followed by a limited.
Other times the local will come and I will choose to wait for the limited even though I do not see it coming, sometimes it works but sometimes, like this morning it takes five to ten minutes to come.
By the time it comes (and sometimes it doesn’t stop because it is crowded) if I had taken the local that came first I would have gotten to the train that much sooner.
So, local or limited bus……….?
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
New York subway experience
Well if you live in the New York metro area, you will at some point travel on the subway.
I have been traveling on these subways for over twenty seven years and everyday is a new experience.
I have been sexually assaulted, attacked by a mentally challenged woman, I have pushed, stepped on entertained by the kids with their “Break dancing” and several other performers, singers, puppeteers, balloons artists, just to mention a few. Let’s not forget, I have been preach to, yes, church on the train.
I have share seats with homeless persons, sometimes after I get off the train I can still smell their funk, people have used my shoulders as pillows, I gave money to the various panhandlers begging for one cause or the other.
I have been stuck in the subway due to flood, sick person on the train, broken switch,
Power outage or someone jump, fallen or was pushed in front of an oncoming train.
New York subways are sometimes like a fashion runway. You will see the latest fashions and also “What not to wear” on these trains.
I also have two experiences of the trains coming to a halt and had to walk across the bridge half way home, the first was September 11, 2001 after the WTC attack and the second was August 14th 2003 massive power outage across the US and Canada.
My partner took me to the train station one morning, and in the evening when he picked me up he said, “Babes, I don’t know how you did this for so long, I watch you go down in the subway and all I could think of is ants. You see them coming out and going in their holes in the ground all day long, just like you do everyday”. (90% of the subway is underground).
I am looking forward to the day when I will no longer have to go down into the subway, and with Gods help, that day will be very soon.
I have been traveling on these subways for over twenty seven years and everyday is a new experience.
I have been sexually assaulted, attacked by a mentally challenged woman, I have pushed, stepped on entertained by the kids with their “Break dancing” and several other performers, singers, puppeteers, balloons artists, just to mention a few. Let’s not forget, I have been preach to, yes, church on the train.
I have share seats with homeless persons, sometimes after I get off the train I can still smell their funk, people have used my shoulders as pillows, I gave money to the various panhandlers begging for one cause or the other.
I have been stuck in the subway due to flood, sick person on the train, broken switch,
Power outage or someone jump, fallen or was pushed in front of an oncoming train.
New York subways are sometimes like a fashion runway. You will see the latest fashions and also “What not to wear” on these trains.
I also have two experiences of the trains coming to a halt and had to walk across the bridge half way home, the first was September 11, 2001 after the WTC attack and the second was August 14th 2003 massive power outage across the US and Canada.
My partner took me to the train station one morning, and in the evening when he picked me up he said, “Babes, I don’t know how you did this for so long, I watch you go down in the subway and all I could think of is ants. You see them coming out and going in their holes in the ground all day long, just like you do everyday”. (90% of the subway is underground).
I am looking forward to the day when I will no longer have to go down into the subway, and with Gods help, that day will be very soon.
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