My Thoughts

We always took for granted that family and friends will always be there to listen and support you, however, that is not so. As people we grow up and grow apart, have different interests and hobby, read different kind of books, our priorities change and sometimes our purpose in someone's life change and we or no longer needed. What is one to do when they are no longer the center of someone's world, the bond they thought they have so security is broken and the relationship is changed. As a people we long to be apart of something or a group and family is the most important. As family grow and change some are left behind, parent become emptynesters and children move on to find their own families. Sometime if we are lucky, children will always keep mommy and daddy as part of their new family even from a far, but sometime mommy and daddy, after they have fulfill their duty as parents are no longer wanted and are left to make new friends and are only called up on in time of crisis. Too many adult children disregard the respect they had for their parents as children, as they themselves become adults. Parents are neglected, disrespected and just abandon like an old toy to be visited out of pity. I for one have raised my children with all the love I have in my heart and if the day should come when they should look at me as a burden or a nuisance, I pray that they will at least be respectful..

Foster Parenting/ Child Services

A few months ago child services contact us and ask us to take a little boy who is the brother of my Goddaughter on a temporary basis. They failed in inform us that they were looking for an adoptive parent for him. They gave us none of his vital information, such as his date of birth, allegories, or if he had any condition they we should be aware of. We had an emergency and had to take him to the hospital and could not give vital information about him. The next day I had to take him for his checkup at the child services medical office only to discover that he has asthma and uses a machine. They took him from a loving home simply because they wanted him to be adopted by people who would let his parent be apart of his life. Now, daddy and mommy are fine, they are not sick or on drugs, or in prison the just want someone else to raise their children while they go about living a carefree life so they can play parent only when if suits them. Now we found out that they wanted us to adopt this little boy, what are we to do? I considered it but at my age I don't think it would be good for him in the long run, and I certainly would not be having daddy and mommy in my home whenever it suits them, furthermore I am leaving the state. Even those I was not the foster parent on record, I became parent by default since I am the only adult female living in he home. I am so furious with the system right now. They did not do a proper investigating to see if we were a proper fit and whether or not we want to adopt. We were not and still are not certified foster parents. He is in our home since February 5, 2016 and we have not receive no help for him to date. No wic benefit, no clothing benefit since 90% of the clothes he came with are hand-me-down and are too big for him. We are buying him clothe and feeding him without being reimbursed by the agency. This system needs to be overall because these children need better advocate who are going to be looking out for their best interest.

Time for a change..

On June 30th 2011 I bought my home in Florida expecting that I would move there within a few months, however that few months is now almost five years. Every year I would go down start a garden only to leave it to die or to be killed by the lawncare person who knows nothing about plants or just did not want care for them. This year I will be moving for good. I can't wait to start my new life. I have made new friends and I am looking forward learning my new neighborhood and working in my garden.

Goals and challenages

It's been a long time since I visit, too busy with so many things going on. So many projects. Sometimes my crochet request leaves me with little time to do anything else since I also have a fulltime job, however, I will try to be better this year. I have signed up with goodread and my challenage is to read 15 books this year, I also would like to do a crochet show which means I have to complete enough projects for at least an hour worth of showing. I have just finished book #1 so you can see that I am far behind and I am in th middle of three crochet pieces. With God's help I am going to accomplish at least one of my goal.

Crochet Dollies..........

Gorwing up a little girl in the West Indies, (Jamaica) I always see my grandmother with dollies on her tables and dresser.They were always so beautiful. To me the always add the finished look to any room. I enjoyed making them and giving them as gift. Today, crochet dollies are a thing of the past, (or are they?) We as a society are so busy running here and there that we don't have time to add a lillte femine touch to our homes. It's too much work, or it just collect dust, or some other such comment. The best one is "only old ladies do that". Well I am here to say that I am not old by any means, and I still love my dollies on my dresser or where ever I think one is needed. I would like to get one person who share my passion and make them the best dolly and let them give their opinion on whether it's just for old ladies or not.

Twin baby girls dress

Hand crochet. 

Your passion

So many times I hear people say that they are bored.   I can't imagine been bored because I always have so much going on.

My three passions are reading, gardening and crocheting.  I read for knowledge and entertainment, I garden because I love to going outside and come back with vegetable that I grow, also I love looking at a beautiful garden. Crocheting is the first thing I learn to do that would keep me acupied for a long period of time. As a child I would sit for hours and crochet things for my dolls. It was hard for me to be bored.  At about ten or eleven years old I realized that I enjoy planting things and watch them grow.  I start bringing home pieces of plants t from relatives or friends went ever I visit. Growing up in Jamaica, most plant grow in abundance so it was OK to take a piece of plant from anywhere.   I soon had a beautiful flower garden.

After I migrated to the USA I continue reading, crocheting and gardening.  Gardening Iwould do in a smaller scale because I could only plant in pots in my apartment. I realized however that I my crocheting came in handy because I could make my own hats and scarves. Over the last thirty years I have made  crochet items as gifts, for sale and for family and myself. I have three children and in each of their homes there are at least two items that I have made.
Growing my own vegetables, a flower garden ( inside or outside), making beautiful pieces and relaxing with a good book are all this that I am passionate about.  These are my passions.  At any given time you could find in my bag a book or my tablet or some type of crochet project, I always have at least two things that I am working on.  When my fingers need a break I can pick up my book.
Whatever you are passionate about.... Enjoy it to tthe fullest.

Poop.....

I realized within the last few months that a normal bodily function that people warely talk about is now a very popular topic of discussion.
This function is a bowel movemnt, doing a number two, dodoo, making stinkstink and there are so many other verbs that discribe this action, the most popular one of late is POOP.
In an effort to bring awareness to healthy living and to be more conscious of what we eat more and more experts, talk show host and guests are constantly discussing our poop..

On the Dr Oz show you will hear some of the reasons you get constipated and don't poop as much as you should and how to try to change that.  On four different talk show I've watched Cameron Diaz talk about her body book, explaining that "not because you chew something, swallow it and POOP it out make it good for you"

 I have heard that if your poop floats that means you have too fat in your diet.  We are encouraged to look at out poop. My questions are how and why? I can't tell by looking in the toilet if my poop is good or bad, and even if I think something looks odd what should I do.
Most of us don't look in the toilet, we do our business, wipe, flush and get up. In any case, we are encouraged to look as a part of knowing what is the result of what we are putting our body.
I once heard that if you look at a toddler's poop and then at a fifty year old's, you will find that the the toddler have a larger poop. The explanation is that you feed your baby healthier than you feed yourself and also that a toddler's colon is much healthier.
Facts or not, it's something to consider the next time you need to POOP.

Why are we afraid of the unknown?

I have lived in New York for over thirty years, but as I get older, I am getting tired of the cold weather.  I decided that I would like to leave the snow behind and headed south, I bought a house in Florida.

Challenge number one I needed to learn to drive. Did that and got my license, OK.  While I am excited and happy, I am also a little apprehensive.  I bought a car with the latest technology to make sure I will always be able to find my way home, however I cannot take myself out of my comfort zone.

There are so many places to go and so many things to see and do.  I'm a captive of my own  fearfulness (smile, writing my truth).  I am here since December and have driven less than a thousand miles.  I am never an explorer, but I will try to move past the boundaries I have set and explore my new city.  Wish me well.  What can go wrong? When I first got my car I was so nervous at the dealership. I knew how to get home from the airport, but this was not the airport. I asked, how do I get home from here, my salesman said don't worry she will take you home, I was home in twenty minutes.

Fear of the unknown will cripple us and make us unable to enjoy the fullness of life. As I am writing I am challenging myself to go out and explore.

When is it Enough

when is it Enough......

Now that I am thinking of leaving my job and security to start a new life in a new place, I find myself wondering will it be enough for me.   I am financially security for now.  I don't need much, with no one to take of but me and my mortgage is almost paid up my living expenses is very small.

So why am I constantly worried?

TO GET INKED OR NOT?

Over the years I have seen tattoos, which was considered a boy’s thing immerge to a ladies accessory. But when do we say enough?
I was once told that if one gets a tattoo, that he or she cannot give blood to save even the life of one’s child. If that’s the case, why are so many women getting tattoos? I would say that one out of every five women I see has a tattoo.
Are we teaching young ladies that tattoos are cool and you have to get inked to be in with the in crowd? I have a few associates that are Jews and they believe that getting a tattoo is defiling the body. We all decorate ourselves at one time or the other but when is it going over board?
When I look at the ladies at the award show on the red carpet and I see so many of them with tattoos in their evening gowns. I asked myself this question; do they think it’s fashionable? Everyone has the right to do as they please with themselves, but I do think that when one decide to permanently cover one’s arm and shoulder in ink then an evening gown of contrasting color should be considered or one that covers these hideous drawing. After all ones body is not a piece of canvas.
Just one persons opinion.

Needless Suffering

Needless suffering.
So many women go through life suffering needlessly, afraid of the “what ifs”.
I am one of those who worry about very and anything. I am past my child bearing years but for about five to six years I have spent every month suffering with chronic anemia from heavy bleeding, low energy, bloated stomach, fatigue, issue with my bladder and pain.
I had fibroids, and I spend four to five days each month in agony. For a long time, friends and associates asked me “why don’t you just have the surgery”; I always find one excuse after the other. When my doctor told me I was going into menopause and things would get better, I no long see the need for surgery.
After one year of not menstruating and while on vacation, I woke up to pain and bleeding, and that was my cue that it’s time.
I came back from vacation and went to the doctor and she advised me that I should have a hysterectomy. All my what if’s and fears presented themselves, however, I ask the Lord to see me and He did. I made preparations, and my doctors and nurses were wonderful. I have my uterus removed, but leave my ovaries. I did not want another large scar on my tummy and I don’t have one thanks to laparoscopic technology.
I just went for eight weeks post-operation check up and was given a clean bill of health. I feel great and my clothes fit better, my over all quality of life is so much better.

The result for out weigh the “what if’s”.
I am telling my story because there might be one person out there who is going through what I did and I just want to say, do it, you will be a happier you.

Wanting More................

Wanting More….
I recently read a book where the female heroin stated that she “wants more” in her relationship.

She did get her "more" and was happy, but, how many of us can say after getting “more” that we are happy? We should not always wait for someone to give us what we think will make us happy, but strive to find happiness for ourselves.
As a young girl growing up, I was mostly alone except when I at my grandma’s house and so I learn at an early age to find my own happiness. Yes, life will be melancholy at times, but it is up to us to decide whether we are going to be bog down with stuff or shake it off and move on.

I always say that my children are my life, but they grew up and moved away and have lives of their own and I am left alone. Sometimes I am a little melancholy (sad because I miss them), but for the most part as long as I know that they are ok I am fine and I can go on to fine my “more”.
Not everyone have what it takes to deal with the stuff that is life, but if you want more by all means ask. Never take it for granted that people around you knows what’s going on with you. You are the only one in your head and therefore the only one who knows what’s there.

Often time people will say they want more but, don’t know exactly what they want. They will look at someone else’s life and think they want what that person have, however, when they get it, it’s not what they really want.

It is at this point one should reflect on their own life to see what if anything they can do for themselves or what changes they can make in they life to make it better (to get more).

Melancholy

In a modern context, "melancholy" applies only to the mental or emotional symptoms of depression or despondency, From the Greek, melancholia- sadness, from the latin - ludgere to mourn.

Since I am not mourning nor am I mentally ill or depressed, I can therefore say that I am in a state of sadness.  This I hope will soon pass.

The holidays are fast approching and it's makes me sad. Sad because somewhere, somehow I have fail at my most important job.  When I look back, can't seems to find the place where I have made an error, but am I suppose to find it or just move forward and try to do better? This, I ponder.

In 2007 someone went into my home and steal almost all of my jewlery. I spent the next year trying to replace them, but with each new piece I bought I relealize that I cannot replace what was taken away.
Almost everything I had was given to me or purchase for a reason, a birthday, christmas, an opology etc. the new pieces however have no meaning, just a reminder of how selfish and envious people are .  This too makes me sad, not sad for me but for the person who think that they have to steal from someone who trusted them.

So, today I will give a hundred and ten precent to whatever I have to do and maybe I will be rewarded with cheerfulness.

I'm just saying...........

Respect

I don't know if it's because I'm getting older why I am so sensitive to things I have put up with for years.

I can't stand men gets on the trains or buses and have no respect for women.  The seats are already too small but the men just spread out their legs and behave as if they are in their living room with their elbow in your side, their newspaper up in front of them to make sure they can't see what's going on around them. They don't want to see or hear you, it doesn't matter how uncomfortable you are.  Even when there are standing room only, they just rub up so closely.  Very rarely do you see a man gets up to give his seat to a woman, doesn't matter if she is pregnant ( the ladies are the ones getting up), sick or old.

I remember on one of Oprah's show, she had the men in the audience getting up and hugging the ladies and saying they were sorry, (they were been surrogates for all the women who had been hurt by men in their lives). Every time I experience it or see it happened to someone it makes me sad.
Yes, I know that it's public transportation and we should not expect to be as comfortable as if we are home or in a private limo, but I think the men should be a little more respect of female commuters and treats us the way they would like the see their mothers treated.

Time and Cost.

All my crochet items are priced according to the size and the materials I will need to finish the piece.

It's usually  two to three week from date of order to finish and delivery.

My Crochet Dresses and more..

Over the years  from time to time some spark an interest and so for the next months I will concentration on this item and crochet until everyone around me is where or using what I have made.

About six months ago someone asked me to make a sweater for her baby girl and so I started making baby things. This time, however I will not only make baby things, I will make a variety of things.

Everything I make will be for sale, or by special order.

Here is a sample of my latest work.....

Father's Day..................

Why do we celebrate mother's day and barely mention father's day?
Mothers and fathers are both important and should be celebrated.

There are many fathers who has taken on the role of mothers on a daily basis.  Do we show them our appreciation on mother's day? No. Therefore, it is only fitting that we do so on father's day.

For a long time my Dad was also my Mom and when he died in 2006 I felt as if I was an orphan.

Let celebrate our fathers that are still with us and show them our appreciation.

MAKE THIS FATHER'S DAY A VERY SPECIAL ONE FOR HIM!

Are we losing our femininity?

As a young girl growing up, I was taught that a ladies’ under things was not for public viewing. A lady should sit with their legs together and cross at the ankle and always mind your manners (your language) especially in public.
Today, however, all of that is gone to the dogs. Ladies think that it’s fashionable to have bra straps as part of their outer wear and underwear (panties) under the sheerest of dresses or pants. Gone are the days when young ladies wear under slips, appropriate under wears or dresses that cover things that should be shown only in the bedroom.

I remember older ladies would pull us over to tell us that our slip was too long, our bra straps were showing or we need to change our clothes because our under wears were showing through.

These days you dear not say anything to a female, young or otherwise unless you are prepared to be cursed out. As female, we no longer take pride in how we carry ourselves. We think looking trashy is sexy.

Sometimes I see ladies sit on the train or buses with their legs spread, or the language coming from their mouth in a casual conversation is embrassing to see and hear.

The way we talk, walk, and conduct ourselves should be all the sexy that is need to be seen.

I am just saying when too many eyes are on you and too many whistles are blowing at you it’s not always a good thing.